Lobow's SPARK

Riding the Roller-Coaster: Adventures in Navigating ADHD and the Power of Relationships

December 11, 2023 Lobow Season 11 Episode 3
Lobow's SPARK
Riding the Roller-Coaster: Adventures in Navigating ADHD and the Power of Relationships
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Have you ever thought about how ADHD is like a wild roller-coaster ride, full of twists, turns, and unexpected squirrel moments? Well, strap in folks, because today, I'm going to take you on a journey through the ups and downs of my personal ADHD adventure that recently culminated in a technology mishap. Yep, you heard it right! My primary computer decided to take a vacation and my backup joined the rebellion with a missing six key. But guess what? I turned that obstacle into an opportunity, a metaphorical lesson on handling executive dysfunction with the power of genuine friendship. 

Then, we dive heart-first into the magic that happens when you find a tribe who gets it, your struggles, your squirrel moments, your ADHD journey. You'll hear directly from members of our ADHD group who share their experiences and the strength they draw from this safe, supportive space. This isn't just about sharing stories of resilience in the face of adversity; it's about celebrating the unique strengths that often come hand-in-hand with ADHD and the power of connections. So get ready for a roller-coaster of emotions as we navigate through the wild ride of ADHD together! Don't worry, we promise to keep all hands and feet inside the ride at all times.

Lobow’s SPARK is proudly supported by Leo Guinan, Kirk Hofstrom, Casey Elliot, Sarah Delano, Justin Allingham, Blushing Crafter, Jamie Young, and Beth Jones.  It is also supported by 10 anonymous supporters.  Whether you want to be mentioned by name or remain anonymous, this podcast does not exist without you.  Thank you so much for your support.

Lobow’s SPARK has started a fundraising effort for Crisis Text Line. We have a goal of $19 per episode as $19 supports one person in their time of absolute crisis with their mental health. If you would like to donate through our fundraiser in titled “Lauren’s Infinity”, the link is listed below.
https://www.classy.org/fundraiser/3638033  

The background music during the recognition parts of this episode, was written by Guy Farmer.  Look him up on Itunes!!

MERCHANDISE NOW AVAILABLE! This is a work in progress but tell me what you want, and I will make it happen!  https://lobowspark.myshopify.com

Support the Show.

Speaker 1:

Welcome back to Lobow's Spark podcast, a podcast centering around ADHD and all neurodivergent people. My name is Lobow and welcome to season 11. This season is going to be different. I am going to throw so many ideas and topics into this season that I hope you can keep up, because it's going to be the most ADHD fucking thing you've ever seen. And, speaking of ADHD, this episode is a solo episode Me just talking to you one on one because, honestly, I made a huge mistake in technology, which is why there's not a guest on with me, but I made a promise to you that I am back once a week there will be a podcast.

Speaker 1:

So this is what we're going to do we're going to flip this where you turn this into a positive, and I'm going to explain to you what the fuck happened. So I spoke with one of my best friends and this season is going to be all about I'm going to alternate best friend, new guest, best friend new guest, so on, so forth Because my goal is to prove that support and love for one another is ultimately more important than anything else. And I know that's cliche and everyone's going to say oh, everyone says that, yeah, everyone says it, but no one actually fucking does it. We are here to do that. Whether it's the Friday night get togethers, whether it's the you know constant, constant check ins with each other that nobody sees. This is what we do here. So, unless you give a genuine fuck about that other person, get the fuck on. If you're here only for yourself, get the fuck on. But I highly doubt a lot of people with ADHD are only here for themselves. It may appear that way because we are absolutely insane in our methods. Right, and our methods can appear so conceited it's. Look at me, look at me, look at me, look at me. That is not our intent. Adhd is the ultimate story of intent versus action. It was not my intent to insult you, but I did. It wasn't my intent to appear like I'm better than you, but I did. It is my intent, and I think a lot of other people with ADHD are like this. It is our intent to promote love, but we are over the top, aggressively loving, and if that is our worst characteristic, so fucking be it. So back to the story. Squirrel moment of the day. I'm going back to my roots here. Going back to my roots, squirrel moment of the day.

Speaker 1:

So did a podcast again with one of my best friends and it couldn't have gone better. It was the most eye-opening discussion I've had in a long time and a couple days later, when I go to offload it, my computer won't start and I don't upload things to the cloud because, let's be honest, does anyone trust the fucking cloud? What is that? What the fuck is the cloud? Is that something up in space that just harnesses all your fucking information? Yeah, no, I'm going to record it local and if it dies, it dies. That's just me. I mean. Honestly, if you're ADHD, how many fucking flash drives do you have? Constantly, it's like, oh, I'll record this, this flash drive, and then this, and then then you've got the thing with your significant other that you really don't want people to see. Yet, come on, I get it, I get it.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, so I didn't record the fucking cloud, but that was detrimental because I have taken a break for months from this and it has been therapeutic and awesome. And then I wanted so bad to come back spark fire, all this kind of shit. Like I usually am right, and the first episode was with another one of my close friends up for the challenge, and I felt like shit that day I felt terrible Mentally. I was not there. Up for the challenge Said we need to show both sides, and that really resonated with me, so I forced myself to do it. I'm not proud of the episode. My voice was gone like it was awful. But he carried me through that. He was the one that did the introductions. He was the one that did the recognitions. All I had to do was show up.

Speaker 1:

If everyone with ADHD had a friend that would show the fuck up every time they needed them, how difficult would this be? You are always going to have the executive dysfunction. You are always going to have these issues that plague you. You're always going to have, on days off, days, depression, all of this. You're going to have that. But what if someone that cared about you so much said just show up and I'll handle the rest, because ADHD is the biggest issue. Showing up. So help them do it, encourage them to show up and let them know that you've got their fucking back and I guarantee you. I can't say that this is social media. I can't say guarantee, but what I can say is that will be massively beneficial for that person. Just show up, I got you. These squirrel tanges are fucking amazing. We're going back and forth and back and forth. Welcome to the ADHD podcast.

Speaker 1:

This is what it is. This is the disorder and the advantage, if you choose to see it that way. So the computer doesn't start at all. But I know I have another Zoom call with a friend that needs me later. So I get the backup computer right. And the backup computer let me be very clear is awesome. It's way better than the primary. It's just the primary has all my files stored. It's got that desktop screen that every ADHD person has with like 100,000 files, but you know exactly where they are. Yeah, that was my primary. My backup is actually quite organized, which is a disaster for me. So, anyways, I get the new computer, I get the backup set up and my keyboard is missing the six key. The password to log into my computer needs a six. And, by the way, you're really going to love the shorts on this because I'm doing TikToks, I'm going to do all these things on just how much effort it took for me to be there for a friend that I knew needed me and, honestly, all of those short little clips. You're going to see why this was such an issue, but to me, it wasn't To me, it was one computer failed, fuck it.

Speaker 1:

Backup plan, backup plan. Backup plan because someone needs me, because when someone needs someone else with ADHD, we get that sense of pride right. We get that sense of belonging that can carry us for a long time. But it's got to be reciprocal. So think about this how frustrated do you get with your ADHD loved one or your ADHD friend? They talk too fast, they're sporadic, they don't make any sense a lot of the times, and then you just kind of shrug it off and you're like, oh, it's just them being them.

Speaker 1:

Well, yeah, but then how many times do you go to that ADHD person when it really fucking matters, when it's I need someone that is going to love me unconditionally, that is going to sacrifice their time for me because they believe in me, genuine believe in me? That's the ADHD person. We don't know any other way. But all or nothing. Now, granted, if we don't like you, then you are the worst human in the world. But if we love you, we will go to the ends of this planet for you and we will show up day after day after day to check in with you. To me that's an advantage because at the end of life and I'm getting jacked up again because this is my whole premise At the end of life, what ultimately matters? What ultimately matters the fact that you Did well in school? If you have ADHD, the way you do things is not wrong, it is different. Oh man, that's so good to be back.

Speaker 1:

Number one thesis on this for me Can you name a single person that changed this world for the better? That was normal. Probably not. Probably not. Next week, next Monday at 1 PM. I promise you I will have my computer fixed, have one of my best friends on and you will really enjoy that, but for now it's just Lo bowel talking to you. It's just Lo bowel talking to you. And God damn, does this give me energy?

Speaker 1:

I learned a lot in the two years I've been doing this, and what I've learned is that numbers don't matter. People do. However, by gaining numbers, you gain more people. The problem is, I don't give a fuck about that. I want personal interaction, one on one, because I know that you're struggling and I know that you're down and I know that this world is cruel, but, good God, can you affect it for the better if you have support from people that love you. That's everything and that is the premise of this season, new category.

Speaker 1:

I would also like to thank the nine anonymous donors to this podcast. Thank you so much for your support. All of you, that means everything and, honestly, it's the premise of every season. But now more than ever, if you have ADHD or any neurodivergence, I love you. I am here for you. I am back despite my technical disabilities. I will see you next Monday at 1pm. I got your back. Let's go, let's go. My story with resilience is literally this podcast and doing this right now, because I feel like I have pushed myself to the maximum amount of effort to get to know each one of you on a personal level and really try to just be a shoulder cry on or someone that can say, pump you up for five seconds or whatever it is that takes us toll after a while. That's ADHD.

Speaker 2:

That's what you care about and you're not going to stop caring about it. You're not going to let anybody get in the way of it, and the world is better because you're here, and this group is better. There are a lot of people that deserve to have you and deserve the spaces that you've created. So thank you, thank you for creating all these spaces.

Speaker 1:

You're the welcome. I like this. Conclusions I like doing it this way. Thank you, kirk, very much, by the way, for that. It is nice to have someone else. My whole promotion is like care about the person, love the person with everything you have. But when it's not quite as intense and someone says something else about you that is a part of this group or that is a friend of yours, that matters, and so, like you know, all these characteristics that we get so frustrated with, they're also the same characteristics that bring us together, and I wouldn't trade that for anything personally.

Speaker 2:

And I agree with everything everyone said about each other too Fun fact, I do an affirmation for myself every day no shit.

Speaker 3:

No matter if it's a few words like I am Blushing Crafter and I am really awesome Can be one of them. If I can't figure anything out specifically, I will tell me self that Every day.

Speaker 1:

I love that. I love that, that's fantastic.

Speaker 3:

I need to say something. One of the things that I wrote down that I hate about having ADHD is that I feel like I don't fit anywhere. But I need to say this I do feel like I fit in here and probably that's because we all have ADHD. We all see the world through the same lenses, even though we still have our differences. But and I want to think low about because, like seriously, I could say beautiful things about everyone here, and it is hard for me to say beautiful things about most people because I think most people are stupid I'm going to be honest and blunt, but I do I do feel like I fit in here and I do fucking love what you did here, Lobow. I struggled so much to find my drive, like people call it, but I feel like I found it here.

Speaker 1:

What is your profession?

ADHD Support and Power of Relationships
Resilience and Connection within the ADHD Group